456 – 459 A personal afterword (old book 295-304)
Vincents text
Norsk Ny dansk bog
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A personal afterword (here is
one possibility, but to be written later after consultation with a publisher) Having
been oppressed throughout this book you may now feel: Guilty,
paranoid, frustrated, drained, upset, numb, tense, angry, pissed,
silenced, dumb, confused, unworthy, cautious, inferior, powerless, fearful,
meek, passive...... Further
oppression could also have made you... protective, inattentive, hostile, turned
off, shrewd, playing games, deceitful, plotting, manipulative, retaliatory,
superior, observant (of the oppressor), crafty, destructive, detached,
cagy.... and finally, perhaps violent! These
emotions are like those experienced by ghettoized blacks living under the
oppressive patterns in the USA and South Africa, by immigrants in Europe,
Palestinians under Israel and in varying degrees by many other oppressed
peoples. The hurt accompanying these emotions forces people into paralysis, hopeless
and self consuming anger.
The irrational and powerless behavior that results in turn fuels white
racism. Being aware of how this vicious circle works gives us the power to
work together to free ourselves from these oppressive patterns... ...for
the love of humanity and our own selves! But
we should not forget one important thing. Having been "oppressed"
ourselves through this book we now run the risk of ending up in the other end
of the oppression pattern: Without
an appropriate or constructive outlet for our pain, we may end up using our
new knowledge to become even more sophisticated racists than before. The
pain, compassion, anger, guilt or sadness you may
feel now demonstrates the human caring in each of us and our deep longing to
see things made right. Many will feel the need to cry or laugh or let someone
near you know what you are feeling. Sharing our feelings and deep concerns
about racism is a meaningful first step toward breaking out of the fear and
inhibition that keeps us stuck in hurtful patterns. I
will leave it to others to present viable governmental solutions on how to
tackle our crushing institutional racism - the sum total
of all our individual racism. I witnessed and personally benefitted from the
progressive government policies which Gunnar Myrdal’s “An American Dilemma”
once inspired. For years after the Civil Rights movement the government tried
to change the oppressive white thinking since - as Myrdal rightly pointed out
- only a lessening of white prejudice would lead to upward mobility of the
oppressed. At the same time, I was depressed seeing how the European tendency
in sharp contrast insists that the minorities first must change in order to become acceptable for the white majority – a
view I fear has since taken over in America and plowed the way for Trumps
divisive and destructive influence. One
beneficiary of the progressive government programs was my mentor, Dr. Charles
King, whom the government employed in his “White people must change” seminars
for employees in the military, CIA, FBI and many other government
institutions and large corporations such as IBM, Federal Express etc. The
idea was that only through a deprogramming of their divisive racism could
their combined unified power “make America strong again”. After having seen
my show Charles King invited me to participate in his seminars as a neutral
observer, “I will not treat you like the others”, he said beforehand and
placed me at his side without telling me anything about what was going to happen.
Then he started abusing, dividing, scolding, accusing, oppressing, and
pitting his participants against each other for two days while showing them
how this was similar to what happens to blacks. As a
white I felt he went too far and felt pity for these highly educated and
fair-minded participants who had agreed with their employer not to escape his
program – although we all at times felt tempted to do that. With his
formidable insight in black and white psychology I saw him gradually break
down these powerful leaders, so they ended up behaving and answering almost
“like children”. He knew exactly what he was doing. He started the first day
by just asking their names - nothing more – and then wrote something on a
small piece of paper with their names on and put it in a box. After two days
of oppression, he asked each of them to come up and read aloud the
predictions he had written about how each of them would react to his
oppressive behavior, how some of them would withdraw into a shell, how
others, “the militants”, would fight back at first, and all the other escape
roles people under oppression typically end up in. In the end he asked them
all individually to write down the feelings they now had, and I was amazed
how similar they all were – also to mine (if only because I had not been
prepared for his oppression). Then he ended by saying that “those are the
exact same feelings we blacks go around with every day because of white
racism. ….But now I will stop oppressing you, I
promise. …..Do you trust me?” In our brokenness
after many such short-lived moments of seeing light at the end of the tunnel,
of course none of us trusted that our great oppressor would ever chance, even
if he “withdrew his knife from 4 to only 2 inches into our backs.” But he
finally did change and ended the two hectic days by throwing a true
liberation party afterwards with plenty of “Black and white Scotch blended
whisky” during which I have never seen such gratitude pouring out toward a
human being. Everyone felt that he had lifted them into a new and freer
thinking. I myself had felt miserably lonesome
during the whole emotional trial since the others now admitted that they had
felt I was a spy or ally of Charles King even though in so many ways I was
shocked experiencing how my inner emotional reactions had been similar to
theirs – both those of the white and the black participants. As an outsider I
was therefore incredibly proud when in the end he introduced me as “the only
modern-day John Brown.” So in the years after I
often took my students with me on excursions to Harper’s Ferry where John
Brown had started his abolitionist insurrection. Charles
King was the first to make me realize that the emotions people had after his
oppression were the same as those of people going through American Pictures
and one reason, I therefore ended up stretching it over two days. His
powerful approach, however, was unsuccessful on college campuses since
students contrary to his normal government employees were not forced to be
“locked up” during his oppression and would soon seek escapes and walk out.
Luckily the mixture of powerful images and music made my students “captive”
and “shell shocked” for five oppressive hours after which they were committed
to a second day of healing liberation – during which they usually were
totally quiet during the first couple of hours, but then – especially under
the impact of my black assistant, Tony Harris, would start opening up and end
in the first deep black-white dialogue they had ever had on campus. Soon they
would be in such happy exchange of feelings with each other that they did not
need us there any longer – and Tony and I would quietly sneak out and go to
the next campus the same evening to start the whole program again. Usually,
they would bring us back within a year to their “American Pictures Unlearning
Racism” groups, but often I didn’t hear about what came out of our
oppression/healing programs until 20 years later when these students met
again to evaluate how American Pictures had changed their lives and they
wanted us to come again. So
“oppressing” people to confront their deeper oppressive thinking about each
other and bring them together in dialogue – eye to eye – is the only
effective way I have seen for healing and combatting racism. The process is
used in various forms by countless other anti-racism counselors whose
workshops I have experienced over the years. Only one method I think is more
effective; that is to move in with those you feel prejudice against. That I
saw whenever I brought students or foreigners or even KKK members with me to
stay with the people trapped in our ghettos and meet them on their own terms.
Soon they would unlearn their fear and guilt patterns which is difficult in
in the safe surroundings of an intellectual university setting. And in the
process, they likewise helped the ghetto dwellers unlearn many of their
deep-rooted anger and hostility patterns. .....For I do not have the necessary academic
background to come up with great institutional solutions to the problem. From
my limited experiences I can at most give readers some ideas how to tackle
their own individual racism. Each reader must of course translate my
“vagabond methods” of “moving in with those you feel prejudice against”
according to his or her own abilities. Though it sounds so easy, from my
workshops I know full well that “love” is not something people can easily learn
or effectively “clothe yourself in” (Colossians 3:12-14) – at least not
before they in healing groups have tried to free themselves from the various
oppressions, traumas, and unhealed anger they each have been exposed to.
Which literally includes all of us. So this is only
my way to illustrate how we cannot achieve integration without a redeeming
love for fellow citizens. Well,
since I’ve seen so many of my students over the years being motivated by
“Christian guilt” to want to do something about their racism, let me just
point out that I am not the first one to advocate such an approach. For
without St. Paul, they would not even have been able to call themselves
Christians. How did Paul and the other apostles succeed in preaching this
bonding fellowship in a hostile and violent multicultural world speaking in
so many tongues? Just think of the task that was given the apostles to go out
and communicate with all the “Parthians, Medes, Elamites, Mesopotamians,
Jews, Cappadocians, Phrygians, Pamphlies, etc.”
about God’s love in their own tongues, - that is in thousands of local
languages. Obviously only through speaking the language of the heart - the
common language that melts all stone hearts. For again, all people are
influenced by loving thoughts regardless of language or cultural barriers.
Only through the convincing love that flowed through the disciples from above
could they in a world of unloved people - deeply scarred from endless
childhood mistreatment and wars - in a few decades reach so many with their
weird message that all people are loved. For all people want to feel loved
and included and something Paul and all the other missionaries quickly
learned - to avoid being stoned to death - as Stephen had become by the same
Saul (Paul’s former name as a “racist” Jew) - yes, it was that if they
thought condescendingly and hostile about those to whom they wanted to pass
on their values, then the audience closed in on themselves and became hostile
themselves. For the language of love also includes “enemy love.” It is no art
to love those who have so much surplus that they can reciprocate the love. So listen for a moment to the words, where Paul openly
reveals his effective method of integration: “If
I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy
gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all
mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as
to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away
all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I
gain nothing” His
disciples gradually growing to thousands of followers could learn to “clothe
yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony.” And so
can we today. When
after a couple of years through the loving help of others I learned to overcome
my fear and distrust of fellow citizens and saw how as a result they now opened up to me, I one day found this poem by Nis Petersen
and felt challenged by it to further try to open up and trust those who still
fueled my aversive fear of people. I illustrated it with my photos and
carried it with me everywhere as an inspiration
and years later it became the introduction to all my lectures,” On saying yes
to those we shun”. With love Jacob Holdt Lovest Thou Man ? Man came towards me – heavily - painfully – behind him the path with slimy tracks of lies and festering sores -. A voice boomed: Lovest thou Man? No! I said – I can’t. Love! Said the voice. Man came – nearer – crawling – drooling of lust – with flies and vermin in the sores of his belly. Hammered the voice : - Lovest thou Man ? No ! I said. Love! said the voice. Nearer – and slowly nearer – inch by inch – the stench was heavy from Lie’s thousands of diseases – and the voice threatened: - Lovest thou Man ? - No – I don’t love ! - Love! Said the voice. Then he rose to his feet – and he stretched his hands towards me, and lo: the spike wounds oozed red – the naked arms were covered to the shoulders with black sores of sin – and the man laughed : - Thus did
God love ! A blindfold fell from my eyes – And I shouted : - Mand – I
love you ! And my mouth was full of blood – the blood of Man. |
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Et personligt efterord (her er et muligt udkast, men det skal
skrives senere i samråd med mit forlag) ENDEN? Efter at være blevet undertrykt gennem hele
denne bog føler du dig måske nu: fuld af skyldfølelse, paranoid, frustreret, udmattet,
uligevægtig, følelsesløs, anspændt, vred, led ved det, mundlam, dum, forvirret,
uværdig, varsom, mindreværdig, magtesløs, frygtsom, sagtmodig, passiv, ……og
til slut VOLDELIG !!! Smerten som ledsager disse følelser, tvinger
folk ud i handlingslammelse, håbløs og selvfortærende vrede. Den irrationelle
og afmægtige opførsel, som den resulterer i, forstærker derpå yderligere den
hvide racisme. Erkendelse af hvordan denne onde cirkel fungerer, gør os i
stand til at arbejde sammen om at frigøre os fra disse undertrykkende
mønstre... af kærlighed til menneskeheden og os selv! Smerten, medfølelsen, vreden, skyldfølelsen
eller sørgmodigheden, du måske føler nu, viser den menneskelige hengivenhed i
os alle og vores dybe længsel efter retfærdighed. Jeg vil overlade det til andre at
præsentere levedygtige politiske løsninger på, hvordan vi kan tackle vores
knusende institutionelle racisme - summen af al vores individuelle racisme.
Jeg har selv været vidne til og personligt draget fordel af de progressive
regeringsprogrammer, som Gunnar Myrdals “An
American Dilemma” engang satte
gang i. I årevis efter borgerrettighedsbevægelsen forsøgte regeringen at
ændre den undertrykkende hvide tænkning, da - som Myrdal med rette påpegede -
kun en mindskelse af de hvide fordomme ville føre til opadgående mobilitet
for de undertrykte. Derfor blev jeg deprimeret over at se, hvordan den
europæiske tendens i skarp kontrast insisterer på, at minoriteterne først
skal ændre sig for at blive acceptable for det hvide flertal - en opfattelse,
som jeg frygter siden også har taget overhånd i USA
og banet vejen for Trumps splittende og destruktive indflydelse. En der nød godt af de progressive føderale programmer,
var min mentor, Dr. Charles King, som regeringen benyttede i hans "Hvide
mennesker må ændre sig" -seminarer for ansatte i militæret, CIA, FBI og
mange andre statslige institutioner og store virksomheder som IBM, Federal Express osv. Ideen var, at kun gennem en afprogrammering af deres opsplittende racisme kunne deres
forenede magt "gøre Amerika stærkt igen". Efter at have set mit
show inviterede Charles King mig til at deltage i hans seminarer som neutral
observatør. "Jeg vil ikke behandle dig som de andre", sagde han på
forhånd og placerede mig ved sin side uden at fortælle mig noget om, hvad der
ville ske. Derefter begyndte han at mishandle, splitte, skælde ud, anklage,
undertrykke og sætte sine deltagere op imod hinanden i to dage, mens han
viste dem, hvordan det lignede det, de sorte er udsat for. Som hvid syntes
jeg, at han gik for vidt, og jeg havde medlidenhed med disse højtuddannede og
ret-tænkende deltagere, som havde aftalt med deres
arbejdsgiver, at de ikke ville flygte fra hans program - selv om vi alle til
tider følte os fristet til at gøre det. Med sin formidable indsigt i sort og
hvid psykologi så jeg ham gradvist nedbryde disse magtfulde ledere, så de
endte med at opføre sig og svare næsten "som børn". Han vidste
præcis, hvad han gjorde. Han startede den første dag med blot at spørge dem
om deres navne - intet andet - og skrev derefter noget på et lille stykke
papir med deres navne på og lagde det i en kasse. Efter to dages
undertrykkelse bad han hver enkelt af dem om at komme op og læse højt, hvad
han havde skrevet af forudsigelser om, hvordan de hver især ville reagere på
hans undertrykkende adfærd, hvordan nogle af dem ville trække sig ind i en
skal, hvordan andre, "de militante", ville kæmpe imod i
begyndelsen, og alle de andre flugtroller, som mennesker under undertrykkelse
typisk havner i. Til sidst bad han dem alle individuelt om at skrive ned,
hvilke følelser de nu havde, og jeg var forbløffet over, hvor ens deres
beskrivelser alle var - også mine (om ikke andet så fordi jeg ikke havde været
forberedt på hans undertrykkelse). Så sluttede han af med at sige, at
"det er præcis de samme følelser, som vi sorte går rundt med hver dag på
grund af hvid racisme. ....Men nu vil jeg holde op
med at undertrykke jer, det lover jeg. .....Hm,
stoler I på mig?" I vores underkuelse efter mange tidligere kortvarige
øjeblikke, hvor vi havde set lys for enden af tunnelen, var der naturligvis
ingen af os, der stolede på, at vores store undertrykker nogensinde ville
give sig, selv når han kortvarigt "trak sin kniv tilbage fra 4 til kun 2
tommer ind i vores ryg". Men til sidst ændrede han sig og afsluttede de
to hektiske dage med at holde en sand befrielsesfest med masser af ”Black and
White blended Scotch” whisky. Aldrig har jeg set en
sådan taknemmelighed strømme ud over et menneske. Alle følte, at han havde
løftet dem ind i en ny og mere fri måde at tænke på. Jeg selv havde følt mig
elendigt ensom under hele den følelsesmæssige prøvelse, idet de andre nu
indrømmede, at de havde troet, at jeg var spion eller allieret med Charles
King, selv om jeg på så mange måder var chokeret over at opleve, hvordan mine
indre følelsesmæssige reaktioner havde lignet deres - både de hvide og de
sorte deltageres. Som udenforstående var jeg derfor utrolig stolt, da han til
sidst præsenterede mig som "den eneste John Brown i vor tid". Så i
årene efter tog jeg ofte mine elever med på udflugter til Harper's Ferry, hvor John Brown havde startet sit abolitionistiske oprør. Charles King var den første, der fik mig
til at indse, at de følelser, som folk havde efter hans undertrykkelse, var
de samme som dem, som folk oplevede efter at se Amerikanske Billeder, og en
af grundene til, at jeg derfor også endte med at strække den over to dage.
Hans magtdemonstrative metoder havde dog ikke succes i universiteterne, da de
studerende i modsætning til hans normale regeringsansatte ikke var tvunget
til at blive "låst inde" under hans undertrykkelse og hurtigt ville
søge flugtmuligheder og gå ud. Heldigvis gjorde blandingen af stærke billeder
og musik mine studerende "fængslede" af "granatchokket" i
fem undertrykkende timer, at de følte sig motiverede til at gå igennem endnu
en dag med helende frigørelse. Her var de normalt var helt stille i de første
par timer, men derefter - især under påvirkning af min sorte assistent, Tony
Harris - begyndte de at åbne sig og endte gradvis i den første dybe
sort-hvide dialog, de nogensinde havde haft på campus. Snart var de så glade
for at udveksle følelser med hinanden, at de ikke længere havde brug for os -
og Tony og jeg sneg os stille og roligt ud og tog til den næste campus samme
aften for at starte hele programmet forfra. Normalt inviterede de os tilbage
allerede inden for et år til deres "American Pictures Unlearning Racism"-grupper.
Ofte hørte jeg igen om, hvad der kom ud af vores
undertrykkelses-/helbredelsesprogrammer op til 20 år senere, når disse
studerende mødtes igen for at evaluere, hvordan Amerikanske Billeder havde
ændret deres liv, og de inviterede mig med til sammenkomsten. Så at "undertrykke" folk til at
konfrontere vores dybere undertrykkende tankegang om hinanden og bringe os
sammen i dialog – i øjenhøjde - er den eneste effektive måde, jeg har set til
heling og bekæmpelse af racisme. Processen bruges i forskellige former af
utallige andre antiracisme-rådgivere, hvis workshops jeg har oplevet i årenes
løb. Kun én metode mener jeg er mere effektiv; nemlig at flytte hos dem, man
føler fordomme over for. Det oplevede jeg, når jeg tog studerende eller
udlændinge eller endda KKK-medlemmer med mig for at bo sammen med de
mennesker, der er indespærret i vores ghettoer, og møde dem på deres egne
betingelser. Langt hurtigere ville de der aflære deres frygt- og skyld-følelser, hvilket er vanskeligere i de
trygge omgivelser i et intellektuelt universitets ”hvide præmisser”.
Og i processen hjalp de ligeledes ghettobeboerne med at aflære mange af deres
dybt rodfæstede vredes- og fjendtlighedsmønstre. Bemærk venligst. Et rigtigt efterord vil blive skrevet efterhånden
i samråd med min eventuelle amerikanske forlægger. Dette er blot nogle idéer.... .....For jeg har som sagt ikke den nødvendige akademiske
baggrund til at komme med store institutionelle løsninger på problemet. Ud
fra mine begrænsede erfaringer kan jeg højst give læserne nogle ideer til,
hvordan de kan tackle deres egen individuelle racisme. Hver enkelt læser må
naturligvis oversætte mine "vagabondmetoder" med at "flytte
ind hos dem, man føler fordomme over for" efter egne evner. Selv om det
lyder så let, ved jeg fra mine workshops udmærket godt, at
"kærlighed" ikke er noget, som folk let kan lære eller effektivt
"klæde sig i" (Kolossenserbrevet 3:12-14)
- i hvert fald ikke før de i helende grupper har forsøgt at frigøre sig fra
de forskellige undertrykkelser, traumer og uforløst vrede, som de hver især
har været udsat for. Hvilket bogstaveligt talt omfatter os alle sammen. Så
dette er blot min måde at illustrere, hvordan vi ikke kan opnå integration
uden en forløsende kærlighed til medborgerne. Nå, men da jeg i årenes løb har set så
mange af mine elever blive motiveret af "kristen skyldfølelse" til
at ville gøre noget ved deres racisme, vil jeg lige påpege, at jeg ikke er
den første, der går ind for en sådan tilgang. For uden Paulus ville de ikke
engang have været i stand til at kalde sig kristne. Hvordan lykkedes det
Paulus og de andre apostle at forkynde dette bindende fællesskab i en
fjendtlig og voldelig multikulturel verden, hvor de talte i så mange
tungemål? Tænk blot på den opgave, som apostlene fik, - at gå ud og
kommunikere med alle "partherne, mederne,
elamitterne, mesopotamierne, jøderne, kappadokierne,
frygierne, pamflerne osv." om Guds kærlighed
på deres egne sprog, - det vil sige på tusindvis af lokale sprog. Naturligvis
kun ved at tale hjertets sprog - det fælles sprog, som smelter alle
stenhjerter. For igen, alle mennesker påvirkes af kærlige tanker uanset sprog
eller kulturelle barrierer. Kun gennem den overbevisende kærlighed, der
strømmede gennem disciplene fra oven, kunne de i en verden af uelskede
mennesker - dybt mærket af endeløs mishandling i barndom og krige - på få
årtier nå ud til så mange med deres underlige budskab om, at alle mennesker
er elskede. For alle mennesker vil jo gerne føle sig elsket og inkluderet, og
noget Paulus og alle de andre missionærer hurtigt lærte - for at undgå at
blive stenet til døde - som Stefanus var blevet det
af den samme Saulus (Paulus' tidligere navn som
"racistisk" jøde) - ja, det var, at hvis de tænkte nedladende og
fjendtligt om dem, som de ønskede at videregive deres værdier til, så lukkede
tilhørerne sig om sig selv og blev selv fjendtlige. For kærlighedens sprog
omfatter også "fjendekærlighed". Det er ingen kunst at elske dem,
der har så meget overskud, at de magter at gengælde kærligheden. Så lyt et
øjeblik til ordene, hvor Paulus åbenlyst afslører sin effektive
integrationsmetode: "Hvis jeg taler i menneskers og engles
tungemål, men ikke har kærlighed, er jeg en larmende gong eller en klirrende
bækken. Og hvis jeg har profetiske kræfter og forstår alle mysterier og al
kundskab, og hvis jeg har al tro, så jeg kan flytte bjerge, men ikke har
kærlighed, er jeg intet. Hvis jeg giver alt, hvad jeg ejer, og hvis jeg
overgiver mit legeme til at blive brændt, men ikke har kærlighed, så vinder jeg
intet." Hans disciple, der gradvist voksede til
tusindvis af tilhængere, kunne lære at "klæde jer med kærlighed, som
binder os alle sammen i fuldkommen harmoni". Og det kan vi også i dag. Da jeg efter et par år gennem andres
kærlige hjælp lærte at overvinde min frygt og mistillid til mine medborgere
og så, hvordan de som følge heraf nu åbnede sig for mig, fandt jeg en dag
dette digt af Nis Petersen og følte mig udfordret af det til yderligere at
forsøge at åbne mig og stole på dem, der stadig gav næring til min aversive
frygt for mennesker. Jeg illustrerede det med mine billeder og bar det med
mig overalt som inspiration, og flere år senere blev det indledningen til
alle mine foredrag: "Om at sige ja til dem, vi undgår". Med kærlighed Jacob Holdt slæbende tungt – i vejen bag det slimede spor af løgn, af vædskende sår -. En røst rungede: - Elsker du mennesket? Nej! Sa jeg – jeg kan ikke. Elsk! Sa stemmen. Mennesket kom – nærmere – krybende – savlende af lyst – med fluer og utøj i bugens vunder. Og røsten hamrede: - Elsker du mennesket? Nej! Sa jeg. Elsk! Sa stemmen. Nærmere – langsomt nærmere – tomme for tomme – stanken tog til af løgnens tusinde syger – og røsten truede: - Elsker du mennesket? - Nej – jeg elsker ikke! - Elsk! Sa stemmen. Da rejste mennesket sig – og det rakte sine hænder imod mig, og se: naglegabene vædskede rødt – til skulderen var de nøgne arme dækkede af syndens sorte sår – og mennesket lo: - Således har Gud elsket -! Der faldt et bind fra mine øjne – og jeg råbte: - Menneske – jeg elsker dig! Og min mund var fuld af blod – af menneskers blod. |